Sunday, January 10, 2010

Every Mom Needs A Break Before The Breaking Point

It’s probably no secret to you that today’s mom is busier than ever. It doesn’t matter if you’re a career mom trying to balance work and family or a stay-at-home mom trying to run the household and manage the many activities your children are involved in. This hectic pace often translates to isolation and leaves you little time for anything else. I’ve been working closely with stay-at-home mothers since 2002 and it’s no secret that most moms will do everything they can to provide the best for their families, often at the sacrifice of their own happiness. We lose contact with friends, don’t take care of ourselves like we used to and seemingly lose our true sense of self. Still, it’s not easy when we have heavy demands on our time and sometimes the only spare moments we have are when everyone is finally in bed and the house is silent. When the house if finally silent, take the time to read a good book, call an old friend or put in that exercise DVD you’ve been promising yourself you’d try. And never be afraid to ask for a break. Ask a trusted friend or family member to watch the kids for a while and go do something fun for a few hours. The kids will be just fine and you’ll be a much happier mama when you return. That’s good for the whole family! Recently, I spoke to Life Coach Aurelia Williams of RealLifeCoaching.net and she told me, “Being a busy mom, it can become so easy to fall into the mommy guilt trap where you start to neglect yourself. Many moms feel guilty if they take time for themselves and end up taking care of everyone else around them and pushing their own needs aside. This ultimately will leave you feeling burnt out, stressed out, truly unhappy and sometimes resentful. During the journey of motherhood, it is easy to lose ourselves along the way and inadvertently cut off or not seek out the support and camaraderie of other mothers.” Aurelia also urges you to give yourself “time to unwind, socialize and bond with others, especially other moms.” This allows you to truly rediscover yourself – you know the woman you were before all those wonderful kids came into your life? When you socialize with other moms, you can gain support, ideas and tips to help you with deal with certain parenting and relationship concerns from others who feel just like you do or have dealt with the same issues. Even when you’re busy, you can always connect with other moms during your children’s activities. Start chatting with other moms at your child’s soccer practice or after her piano recital. Social opportunities are available to you many times in the day – you may just not notice it.

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