The Art Of Getting Your Kids To Talk To You

Being a parent isn't easy. Some days just getting everyone in your family all together at the same time for dinner can seem like the "impossible dream". Between after school sports and clubs and working and errands and carpools, it's not surprising that almost half of the parents in a recent survey said they feel a growing distance between themselves and their children.

Today's children have more things to deal with than kids did even twenty years ago. Drugs, violence, mixed messages in advertising, peer pressure, packed schedules and outside activities all add to the pressure they face.

So how, in the midst of all this chaos, do you find time to talk to your kids -- and more importantly, have them talk back to you?

Here are several ideas that can help:

1. Eat dinner together as a family at least three times a week. Conversations flow easier when they happen around the dinner table. If your family is conversationally-challenged in the beginning, think of conversation starters before each meal. Plan a family vacation, letting each child talk about where they'd like to go, or what they'd like to do. Talk about current events, the latest movies or upcoming special events. Ask your children open-ended questions that have to be answered with more than yes or no.

2. Turn off the outside world. Set aside "family time" each night and have everyone turn off their phones, the computers and the television. Let your friends and extended family know that you won't be available during that time, and stick to it. Your kids (especially teenagers) may joke about it, but secretly they'll probably be delighted. Use this time to reconnect with each other. Watch a movie, play board games, take turns reading out loud, but whatever you do, do it together.

3. Cook at least one meal a week together. Even your youngest children can do something to help. If your kitchen is too small for everyone to fit, schedule a "helper" or have your children be responsible for different parts of the meal. Your family will grow closer during this time, and your kids may even start the conversations themselves. (You can always get the ball rolling by talking about things you did with your parents. While you may not be cool, chances are your kids think your parents are, and will be impressed).

4. Make it safe for your kids to talk to you. Let them know that you won't get angry or upset if they talk to you about what's going on. If they tell you something "off the record" then let it stay that way. (Emergencies and dangerous situations aside).

5. Listen to what they have to say. If you're working, or doing something else when your child starts to talk to you, they may give up if they know your attention is really somewhere else. Give them your undivided attention when they're speaking.

6. Use active listening skills. Make sure that you understand what your child is telling you. Repeat what they told you and ask questions.

7. Set aside special time to spend with each child. It may be nothing more than taking one child at a time with you when you run errands, but let each child know that you value spending special time with them.

8. Be patient. Don't expect a "perfect" family. If you're not June Cleaver and your husband isn't Howard Cunningham, it's okay. Just remember that perfect families really don't exist outside of television re-runs.

Just keep trying, and you'll learn the art of conversation with your kids isn't as hard as you thought!

How to Find a Good Inexpensive Hotel

When going on vacation somewhere you have never been it can be hard to find a good quality Hotel working on a budget. So here is a guide to help you find a good place cheap, so you don’t have to worry about where you will stay. In my life I have done a great deal of traveling, and I have many nightmare stories about the things that have happened to me in some of the cheap hotels I have stayed in. I remember once I was ok a ski trip and half the floor in my room actually dropped about 6 inches. I woke up and my head was lower then the rest of me and was confused for several seconds before I managed to come to my senses. Lucky for me the room was on the first floor. On another trip, the police raided the hotel looking for illegal immigrants, and there was noise all night long. It was probably quiet the next night, but I did not stick around to see. Finding a good inexpensive hotel should not be a gamble. The best way to find a good hotel is to go to a place you have been before, but assuming that is not an option the next best thing is from someone who has been there. If you know someone who has been to the same vacation spot as you are planning on going, ask them about the place they stayed, the worst that can happen is they tell you they hated it or that it was too expensive. But what if no one you know has ever been to where you are going to be? Unless you like to gamble, you can't just make reservations anywhere, if you are looking to gamble on something play blackjack or poker in a casino, but don’t roll the dice with the place you are going to use as your home base for your vacation. Use the internet to look for hotel reviews. There are many websites that have reviews from people who have stayed in the hotel. Now one mans hell may be another mans heaven, but at least this way you can see that 5 people stayed there and said it was fine and two said it was not good maybe these 2 people were the exception. Or maybe the two that did not like the hotel were in town for business in an area popular with tourists. This can be an annoying situation when everyone around you is partying and you are trying to sleep, this is one of the reason why no business is conducted in Daytona Beech during Spring Break. Talking with a travel agent is always a great way to assure your happiness with your lodgings, and helps keep the gambling in the casinos and out of your room. A good thing to do is to make sure to ask lots of question on the phone with any hotels you are considering staying in.