Keeping Kids Active This Summer

Experts say that kids need 60 minutes or more of physical activity a day. With childhood obesity on the rise, it’s even more important to keep our kids interested in sports. Keeping these tips in mind could help your children enjoy activity even more.

Let them lead the way.
    Kids stay active when it’s fun for them, so try to keep it that way. Don’t force them to do any activity that they’re not comfortable with. If your child would rather play tag than swim, do it. You’ll both be moving, and having a great time.

Mix it up a bit.
    Different sports are fun for different kids. Introducing your children to as many activities and sports as you can, will allow them to discover what they truly like.

Don’t keep score.
    Pushing kids to excel could lessen their interest in certain activities. Forget about the score, and let them invent their own goals. The true measure of a successful season for any child is whether they want to play next year.

    Remember to make sports a family affair. Your children will be more enthusiastic about physical activities if you lead by example. In the dog days of summer, try to devote an hour each evening to being active with your children. Turn off the television and have some quality fun!

The Three-Ring Circus: 5 Tips for Single Moms Who Work

If you're a single mom who works, you probably don't have a lot of time to read, so let's get right to the point. In addition to your salaried work, you're a chauffer, a nurse, a psychotherapist, and an educator. It's as though you're not only the ringleader of your family, but you're also the master juggler (of schedules), the tightrope walker (of finances), the lion tamer (of behavior), and the trapeze artist (as you swing from home to work and back again). Here are five tips to help you keep your sanity when the circus takes up permanent residence in your household.

1. Pick Your Battles

As a 49-year-old single mom of a sixth grader, I'm just plain tired. It's taken me years to get over my perfectionism and realize that I have to choose my battles, both in my work and on the home front. I no longer write long missives pointing out why I was right and my co-worker was wrong. In the long run, it doesn't really matter. The earth won't stop revolving on its axis because my son wants to grow his hair past his shoulders. I'm just thankful that he's not trying for to break the Guinness record for the longest Mohawk. I've learned the hard way that it's best not to sweat the small stuff...and most of it is small stuff.

2. Set Your Boundaries

Picking your battles doesn't mean you shouldn't set boundaries at work and at home. I tend to be a workaholic, so this one has been tough for me. But I've learned to say "no" when necessary, and to set firm but fair ground rules with my son. He knows what I expect, he has his routine, he understands his responsibilities, and he comes through almost all of the time. At first, it's hard to stand your ground and be the enforcer, but kids will start toeing the line and life will get much easier.

3. Use Promises Sparingly

When you're a single mom, life happens. Even the best laid plans can easily go awry, and promises made are often broken. Better than anyone else, you know that kids need stability and they need to know that they can count on you. I've learned to only make promises that I know with certainty that I can keep. When my son asks if we can go to a movie on Thursday night, I may tell him that I can't promise it will be Thursday, but that we'll go by the end of the weekend. If Sunday rolls around and we haven't gone, I grab my purse and we head out the door - even if there are a dozen other things I'd rather be doing.

4. Try for Balance

As a single mother, it's hard to achieve balance. Everyone and everything has needs - your kids, your kids' school, your boss, your clients, your home, your car, your pets, and so on. Sometimes it feels like I'm trying to hold a dozen ping-pong balls underwater, but inevitably one pops up. I've worked with my son to make what we call our "conscious living" list. We have a master list of fun things we want to do, projects around the house, and assorted tasks and chores. We sit down once a week and choose a couple of fun things (like playing cards or baking cookies) and a couple of projects (like cleaning behind the refrigerator or hacking at the weeds in the yard). I've found that setting an intention to do something helps me find the time to do it. At the end of the week, I'm often pleasantly surprised to discover that I've managed to spend time with my son, run errands, and get chores done around the house.

5. Let Go of the Guilt

As single moms, guilt is our greatest enemy. It can be paralyzing, can distract us from our work, and can put distance between us and our children. Our lives may not have turned out the way we intended, but we have to let ourselves off the hook. We're doing the best we can with the physical, emotional, and financial resources we have. As long as we love our children fiercely and without reservation, they'll make it and we'll make it. And, ultimately, we'll be glad the circus came to town.

Make Exercise A Family Priority

A Mom’s daily calendar is almost always overscheduled. Each day usually starts early and ends late. It may include lots of running in circles (at least it can feel that way). But, probably is lacking any real physical activity. With children returning to school, the schedule gets even tighter due to school requirements and events.

It may seem an insurmountable task to get your family into the healthy habit of regular exercise. Yet, with the disturbing recent obesity trends, it’s an extremely important habit to adopt. Studies have indicated that children are 40% less active than they were just 30 years ago. This has negative effects for kids in physical, psychological, and social areas.

So, being an active family needs to become a priority. Fortunately, it’s actually easier than you may think. With a little planning you can find ways to incorporate workouts into the time you spend with your children. Regardless of your children’s age, there’s a way to find time to workout (often even with your kids)! Here are some tips organized by age, which will add to your family time together and help to keep the whole family active!

Age: Infant through pre-school

Play a game of keep-away or tag.
Occupy them for even 15 minutes with a video or toy while you do some toning exercises like squats and tricep dips.
Grab your stroller and go for a brisk walk. Or, buy a jogging stroller for more flexibility. With a jogging stroller you can walk faster, jog or even run at a fast pace. And, for veteran rollerbladers, you can even use the stroller for some skating time. Don’t forget the kid helmets.
For younger children, you can use a back carrier to transport them while walking. This can burn even more calories as the extra weight makes it more challenging.
Turn on some music and dance together. Toddlers love dancing, especially when their parents join in.
Play hopscotch – yes, you will work up a sweat.
Push your kid on a swing. And, after every push complete one squat.
Use an infant carrier or bike trailer to enjoy a bike ride together.


Age: Grade School

Try rollerblading or skating together.
Spend an afternoon at a park with a playground, but don’t spend the whole time relaxing on the sidelines – join in on the fun. Spend some time swinging to help workout your legs. Try making it across the monkey bars – even just once (it’s a great upper body workout and you’ll be amazed that your kid does it with such little ease). Try some pull-ups using a bar on the playset. Do some tricep dips on a nearby park bench.
Get a small group together for a kickball or softball game.
If your child can ride a bicycle at a moderate pace, jog alongside of them.
Involve your kids while you strength train. Let them count your reps out loud for you and/or clock your rest time in-between sets.
Try a game of marble pick-up. Set up a circle (or more than one) of marbles. Compete with each other to see who can pick them up quicker following certain rules (e.g. not being able to bend from the waist but instead using a squatting technique to grab them). Adults will get an extra workout if they squat while balancing on just one foot.
On rainy days that force you inside, walk or run up and down the stairs. You might even make it a contest to see who can finish 5 complete rounds first.


Age: Teenagers

Register for a fun run (or walk) event and spend time together training for the event.
Set up an obstacle course in your back yard. Then try such things as quick sprints back and forth between two objects, hopping over a line of sticks, and running zig-zags around a line of cones.
Play tennis or basketball together.
Consider joining a community volleyball or softball team that includes enthusiasts of all ages.
Don’t just sit and cheer your kids at their sporting events. Every few minutes do some walking or jumping jacks or squats.
Learn how to do strength training exercises that require partners. There are dozens of options that work both individuals’ bodies. For example, partner squats where two people stand facing each other, grasp each other around their forearms and squat simultaneously as if sitting in a chair.
Implement a daily family walk each day before or after dinner.
Work together in the yard raking leaves, planting flowers, trimming trees.


Sure, you may have a very full plate but isn’t it time to throw out the “I’m a parent – I don’t have time to workout” excuse. Don’t focus on the frequency or irregularity of your workouts. Take the opportunities for physical activity when they arise. If you implement these above activities for just 30 minutes three times per week, you can easily burn an extra 450 calories or more!

Plus, working out sets a great example for your children that will teach them at an early age how important (and easy) it is to make physical fitness a part of daily life. Exercising with your kids also provides the extra bonus of spending quality time together.

Family - The Basic Social Unit

Family is the basic social unit. Family represents people living together by ties of marriage, blood or adaptation, thus representing a single household. According to sociology, the family has the primary function of reproducing society; biologically, socially, or both. There are various structures of a family based on the relationship shared between the parent and the children. The different types of family are patrifocal, where the family consists of a father and his child; matrifocal, where the family consists of a mother and her child. Consanguineal family is one which consists of the mother, the child and other people, mainly belonging to the family of the mother. The conjugal family consists of one or more mothers and their children, with other people and one or more spouses.

The parent-child relationship varies due to different cultures. One of the prominent forms is the nuclear family. It consists of the marital pair living with their offspring separately. The joint family is an extension of the nuclear family. Joint family occurs when children of one sex live at their parents’ house. In a joint family, the children bring along their spouse to live with them at their parents’ house after marriage. A joint family usually consists of an older man and his wife, his sons and unmarried daughters, his sons’ wives and children. Members of a joint family share all the task of trade, food gathering and preparation and child rearing.

Children who share one parent but not another are called “half–brothers” or “half–sisters”. Children who do not share parents, but whose parents are married, are called “step-brothers” or “step-sisters”. Similarly, if a person is married to the parent of a child, but is not the parent of the child themselves; they are called “stepfather” or “stepmother”.

A complex family involves more than two adults. It refers to any extended family or to polygamy of any type. A joint family is also known as a complex family. The parents and their children in a joint family live together under a single roof. In a joint family setup, the womenfolk are often housewives and cook for the entire family. The patriarch of the family is usually the oldest male member, who lays down the rules of the family. This kind of setup is fast eroding in many parts of the world. Almost all the urban families are switching over to the nuclear family society.

How to Avoid Tantrums in Kids of All Ages

Let’s face it, kids will be kids and they can’t possibly always be happy with every single decision that is made for them. Even from a very young age a child realizes that he/she is, in fact, a REAL person, with feelings, thoughts and emotions. This often leads to them wanting to do things their own way, making their own choices, or just not wanting to do as they’re told.

Here’s a scenario: your child is sitting happily playing with building bricks, or maybe playing on a games console, totally engulfed in his or her own world, and it’s time for dinner. You ask your child to drop what they’re doing there and then, to tidy up quickly, to leave their ‘happy place’ and come eat. Your child refuses to do as asked, wondering within why on earth you’re being mean and spoiling their fun.

You, on the other hand may think the child is being naughty or obstinate. You remove the toys/games abruptly and the volcano erupts! Your child is throwing a full-blown tantrum!

Now, let’s re-create the scenario: As before, your child is sitting happily playing and you’re about to start making dinner. You give the child fair warning that playtime will be ending soon, in say 5-10 minutes, and that they will then need to put their things away so that they can help you make dinner.

Stick to your time-frame and get the things put away (help if you’re needed), and involve your child in the dinner-making. Depending on your child’s age this could be anything from wiping the table to boiling potatoes or even carving the meat. (Ok, so we may not have huge set meals every day, but you get the idea).

Wow! You just avoided a MAJOR tantrum! Your child is involved and happy, you are happy and non-stressed! Well Done You!

You can do this sort of thing with just about any scenario. Turn it around from something negative i.e. removing child from ‘happy place’ and replacing in ‘upset place’, to moving child from one happy place to another. You just have to make sure that your child knows beforehand that something other than what they are doing at the moment will soon be happening.

Let your child get involved and make sure you tell him/her how much you appreciate their help and co-operation. This way you will avoid the horrid confusion that ultimately leads to those dreadful tantrums.

Make reading fun - use personalized stories

Reading regularly from an early age has enormous benefits for a child throughout childhood and in later life: * Increased comfort with reading A comfortable reader is a confident reader. This means that the speed with which something can be read increases (useful for absorbing information, in exams, and also later on in the place of work), and the reader is also more likely to be confident and effective when reading aloud. (Presentations, the school play!) * Increased word power Coming in to contact with words more frequently means they are more likely to stick in the reader's mind, improving spelling. Reading often also enhances the chance of encountering new words, and therefore increases the range of the reader's vocabulary * Increased knowledge Whether reading for pleasure or for school, college or work, books help to broaden our horizons, increasing the general knowledge of the reader. So, how can we ensure that our children read, and read regularly? There is a simple thing to bear in mind to ensure a child wants to read - the child has to enjoy reading! And how is this achieved, I hear you say? For a child to enjoy reading, the subject matter must be one that they have some familiarity with and more importantly, that they are interested in. Now here's the real trick : There is nothing that interests any child more than themselves! Personalized stories will inspire the child to read and re-read a story, because this will be able to relate directly with the main character. (It is after all, themselves, usually taking part in some adventure akin to the kind of imaginary play the child would normally partake in.) Even if you are reading a story to an infant or toddler, the repetition of their name will generate interest and excitement in the story which will ensure that they enjoy reading the story themselves when they are older. There are many personalized stories available to buy over the Internet, ranging in price and quality. Because of the personalized nature of them, they make an ideal gift for special occasions such as birthday's and Christmas presents. Things that you should consider when looking to buy a personalized story book: - what level of personalization do you require? (Simply the child's name, or other details too i.e. friends, age etc.) - does the book promote a positive message? - how durable is the book? - what will it cost? (Don't forgot to factor in shipping costs!) - how long does it take to manufacture? (This can often be the more important factor, particularly if purchasing as a gift.)

When It is alright to let them decide?

Yesterday I took my son to the barber shop to get his back to school hair cut. As we sat in the barber shop, I reminisced over how much my son has grown. I remember the first time I took him to the barber shop, I had to sit in the barbers chair and have him sit on my lap just so he could stop squirming and get his hair cut. And now look at him, he walks into the barber shop as if it is second nature. True, I still have my moments when I stand by the barber’s chair, and oversee him and my son as they have their “man” talk. But yesterday all that changed. As I went to the barber shop with my son, he ran over to the pictures of hair cuts on the wall and said “mommy, I want this one.” All of the guys laughed at him, jeering him “your mother is not going to let you get that son, not until your older.” But as I looked in Isaiah’s eyes, I couldn’t help it. I had to allow him to have this one decision. For once I was going to step back and let him decide on how he wanted his hair to look. As I swayed past the older men in the shop, to get a closer look at the picture, I couldn’t believe it! My son wanted to get a Mohawk with a spider man design on the side. As I turned around to tell him pick another cut, I remembered the look in his eyes and the excitement on his face as he marched up to the picture and pointed to it and said: “mommy, I want this one.” How could I turn around and tell him no. As he sat in the chair, the barber looked at me, the older men looked at me, and Isaiah looked at me as if they were all waiting for me to yell: STOP, I’m not ready for this, he’s too young to make this choice!” But I just politely smiled and stared back at them and cheered Isaiah on. As I watched him get his hair cut, I began to wonder, at what point do we let our children began to make decisions for themselves? When do we step back and let them take control? Sure this time it was something as minor as a hair cut. But later on who knows what it will be? How do we prepare them to make good decisions? Or to accept the decisions that they’ve made? As parents we always want to hold their hand, choose which path that we assume is the right path for them and watch themhappily march down it. We always want to be the ones who block the bumps, pitfalls, and cover up the spills, but when do we stop? Should we start teaching them decision making skills at at four, five, six? Or do we wait until they get older? After Isaiah got his hair cut and I brought him home, he rushed upstairs to the mirror and looked at his hair cut. I couldn’t quite figure out what he was doing, so innocently I asked “what’s up?” As he turned around to answer me, he had... (read the full article at the link below)

Choosing

It is no secret these days that breastfeeding is best. This information comes at new mothers from every direction. Obstetricians, pediatricians, and parenting magazines all agree that breastfeeding is the way to go. So why are there so many different bottles on the shelves these days? Because not all mother’s are able to breastfeed and those that do, need an occasional evening away from baby. With all the choices out there, it can be difficult to decide which bottle is best. When making your decision you should take into consideration the cost of the bottle, your baby’s preference, and any health problems your child may have. Here is a brief description of the bottles on the market right now. This information should make your decision a little easier...(read the full article at the link below)

Boost Your Child's Vision

Vision problems often run in families, but there are some factors that you can control in your child’s environment to help their eyesight. Try these tips to give your child’s vision a better chance.

Brighten things up.
Unfortunately, your mom was right: reading in dim light can wreak havoc on your eyes. Buy your child a good reading light, or make sure that homework is done in plenty of natural light.

Give them space.
Place a pillow about eight feet away from the TV, and tell your child they have to watch it from that distance. Sitting too close to a television leads to the same focus problems that your child can develop from using computers and video games.

Take breaks.
Experts agree that kids’ increased computer use can cause focus problems, particularly the ability to refocus on objects far away. Take note of how much time they spend in front of the computer, and make sure they take a ten-minute break every hour.

Buy shades.
Your child may not need glasses, but it’s a good idea to buy them sunglasses. UV exposure can lead to macular degeneration or the early development of cataracts.

Don’t skip eye exams.
Children should be screened by an eye doctor or pediatrician between 6 and 12 months, 3 and 3 ½ years, at 5, and then annually after that.

It’s not too late for adults to start practicing these techniques, also. Make them a family habit, and you could slow the loss of your vision as you age. It’s important to set a good example for your children, too.

Birthday Flowers Buy Your Birthday Flowers Online!

Birthday flowers are a very inexpensive way to maintain an old tradition, that many people are unaware of. Below is a list of the months of the year along with the corresponding birthday flowers. Think about giving birthday flowers as a sign of good luck at the next birthday party on your calendar. Flowers are great way to show someone you care, just like Mother's Day flowers are given, with Birthday Gifts flowers can also be a welcome gift.
Did you know these fun facts about some of the birthday traditions around the world?

Greeks would take cakes to the temple of the goddess of the moon, Artemis, and round cakes were used to represent the full moon. Candles were used on these Greek cakes to represent the fantastic glowing moon.
Some Germans used one large candle in the center of the cake to represent the "light of life." The smoke from the candles being blown out would carry their wishes to heaven, and blowing out all the candles at once would bring good luck.

Another tradition that is believed to bring good luck is the giving of birthstones, birthday flowers, or colors used to represent birth months.
An interesting birthday custom from Japan is that they used to celebrate all birthdays on January 1st, however, that tradition has been lost as most Japanese now celebrate on their true birthday.

A tradition that is over 3000 years old is the Mexican tradition of having Piñatas decorated with paper and with flowers, filled with candles and treats that the children hit with a stick until it is broken open.

It is believed that Europe is the place of origin of how common birthday parties. It was believed that evil spirits were attracted to people on their birthday. Family and friends would gather together to surround the birthday person with good thoughts and wishes to protect them from harm. Giving gifts at these "parties" was also believed to generate more good cheer and ward off these evil spirits.

Giving flowers today on someone's birthday is an easy and convenient way to show that you care. Birthday flowers can be purchased fast easy and cheap with our online services.

Why Choose a Bunk Bed for Your Child?

Why should you choose childrens bunk beds for your home? Bunk beds can bring a number of endless possibilities to your living area. Whether you have restricted space, or you want to create more available floor space in a room, bunk beds may be just the answer you are seeking. There are twin bunk beds and combination bunk beds with a twin mattress on top and a full mattress on the bottom, as well as loft bunk beds which can offer considerable storage space. There are numerous bunk bed options available for any room layout you are trying to create.

Bunk beds save space:

Bunk beds come in all shapes and sizes. There are bunk beds that come with enough compartments for practically everything you could possibly need space for, all in one beautiful piece of furniture that doesn't take up much living space at all. Bunk beds offer the added benefit of utilizing vertical space as opposed to horizontal space. This frees up floor space for other needed uses and is an ideal solution for smaller rooms. Bunk beds are also great for compact or studio apartments where you need all the space you can get. Loft apartments are growing in popularity, converting large buildings in highly populated cities into individual living spaces. Bunk beds can help you creatively use your available area in a small loft apartment.

Bunk beds are fun:

Bunk beds offer a different alternative from a standard bed. For children and teens, bunk beds offer a sense of fun. Siblings can stay close to each other, yet have their own space to sleep. Youngsters can pretend they are in a fort, on a pirate ship, or a damsel in distress awaiting rescue from the knight in shining armor who will climb up the ladder to save her; bunk beds tend to let one's imagination soar.

Bunk beds give you more available space for overnight guests:

Birthdays, parties, family reunions - we all love those great get-togethers. Wouldn't it be great to have extra overnight bed space for those special loved ones that you don't get enough time to visit with? Have a fun-filled day of activities, enjoy a leisurely evening with no one in a rush to get home, because they will be home for the evening, and get a fresh start the next morning. Bunk beds can help give you that opportunity.

Bunk beds are great for children/teenagers:

Bunk beds are a must for older children or young teens having to share a room with another sibling. Bunk beds give each child his or her own space. Sleeping on the top bunk bed is generally not recommended for children under 6 years of age, due to the fact they are more likely to fall. Guard rails on both sides of the top bunk bed mattress can help prevent falls from occurring. A secure bunk bed ladder and a night light can also be beneficial.

Some types of bunk beds can be taken apart and used as a regular bed. If a teenager has an opportunity to move into his or her own room at some point, he or she already has a bed to furnish it with, leaving the child sharing the previous room with his or her own bed as well. Bunk beds serve multiple purposes and are a diverse piece of furniture that can work in practically any living space.

You Have A Home Air Purification System But You Neglected Everything Else!

Home air purification systems are being purchased by the millions. Many adults both with and without children are realizing that the one thing they can control in their home is the air they breath. Many have done their diligent studies or took it on recommendation that the air outside is harmful, but the air inside(up to 70 times more toxic)can be made cleaner by purchasing and installing some sort of unit that will help clean the air.

And a good choice it was. Several units will filter out the dust, the dander from their pets, and some other particulate that is unseen. Some units can even filter out some of the toxins that float around us while we are in our home. And they work too.

But did you know that these airborne toxins, once on the skin, can actually cause as much harm to you, your children and your pets, as it does to inhale them? Most people know this subconsciously, but they neglect to do anything about it.

Most of the products that you bring into your home from the store to use for whatever purpose contain chemicals that over time can and will bring harm to you. Most of us think that these products could not be sold to us if this were true. Unfortunately, there is no requirements for testing these products and there is no requirement to even list everything they contain on the label (testing is done as we know, with animals, and many companies have found alternative testing methods. But there are a surprisingly high number of brand name companies that still do animal testing. That is a whole other discussion). I was surprised to learn that, because I live in a country that seems to regulate everything else, why not consumer and personal care products as well.

There are countless examples you can take a look at from the products in your home right now. I’m sure you have seen them already. Look at your oven cleaning solution. Does it say anywhere on the container “danger”, “warning”, “poison”? Do the instructions indicate that you should use gloves when applying? How about to have good or adequate ventilation?

Look at your floor cleaners, or window cleaners. Did you know that ammonia, which is a good cleaning agent found in window cleaners, can cause an irritated nose: maybe some slight breathing problems? And not to mention the injury you could sustain if you get it in your eyes. Long term, or repeated exposure could have an effect on the lungs, could cause pneumonia, cataracts, glaucoma, kidney damage, the list goes on. And that’s just ammonia. The recommendation when handling ammonia is to avoid skin contact (we are talking about pure ammonia here). Wear protective gloves and chemical-resistant clothing. The National Institute for Occupational Safety and Health (NIOSH) recommends wearing gloves made of Butyl, Teflon or Viton for up to 8 hours of exposure and Nitrile gloves for up to 4 hours of exposure. Keep clothing clean and free of oils and grease. Even diluted, does that give you cause enough to get rid of everything containing ammonia that YOU brought in?

In the personal care section, I can tell you first hand that the products you use on your head, by and large contain chemicals that render bacteria sterile (they used to be able to kill the bacteria by adding formaldehyde to the mixture. This was done for many years but has since been changed). The ingredients in use today do not “kill” any bacteria that may have gotten into the mix: they make it so the bacteria cannot reproduce while it is sitting on the store shelf. Otherwise, you would be putting a significant amount of bacteria onto your scalp everyday and if you had a scratch or cut on your head or neck, you would get a serious infection. Unless a company uses a plant extract or herb, a chemical like this cannot be healthy. Man made phosphates and man made chemicals derived from petrochemicals located in your soaps, toothpaste, and deodorant also absorb through our skin and can cause immediate problems and problems over time.

Stop and think about where you spend most of your time. How about your kids? Chronic conditions are more problematic in women because women do most of the cleaning in the home. They are exposed to these chemicals for more time, and over time. Pregnancies can be complicated and asthma in children can be traced back to the chemicals and chemical products we use everyday.

What should you do? You started out by purchasing and installing a home air purifier. That is a start. Now, you really need to either get more education on the various hazards you continue to bring into your home and expose you and your family to, or, make the decision to change to products that are much safer to use. They may be hard to find, but don’t you think that you are taking a great risk just to save a couple of dollars for a product that is on sale or that you have used all of your life, therefore it must be good?

Make the change. Start today. You are working hard for everything else in your life, now you need to make your life (your body) stop having to work so hard to save you.

Woof! I Can Help

As a family psychologist, I’m always interested in learning about different therapeutic approaches to helping kids. One approach that receives much less attention than it deserves is therapy involving animals, especially pets.

Animals can help reduce the vulnerability children feel when they are working on different types of behaviors or emotional challenges. Whether you have to talk to your child about “all the missing cookies” or a more serious matter, the presence of a pet can go a long way toward reducing his or her discomfort and self-consciousness. Being able to hug a dog or pet a cat while dealing with some tough issues helps to limit the feeling of “being on the spot.” The warmth of an animal’s body, the softness of its coat – the very fact that it is a living thing – provides an opportunity for emotional relief and connection.

Many pet owners say they enjoy the unconditional love an animal provides. What is perhaps more important is the opportunity a pet provides to express love.

I’m not suggesting that you immediately rush off and buy a pet if your child is dealing with behavioral or emotional challenges. But if your family would like a pet and can make the commitment to provide it with a good, safe home; it’s worth considering. Your child may enjoy researching different animals and planning for its care.

Many parents have learned that pets are an excellent way to build empathy as well. Taking care of the family pet, or a stint “dog-watching” or “cat- sitting” for a neighbor might be a child’s first job. Children sense that living things require greater care on their part and usually rally to meet expectations when they’ve been given a sense of responsibility for an animal: picking its name, selecting its collar, choosing special pet snacks or toys at the grocery store. Animals serve both as real companions and as potent symbols that wind their ways deeply into children’s minds, providing a health opportunity for emotional projection. Why else would animals show up so frequently in children’s art and stories?

Some studies have even shown that the presence of a dog while learning to read or play the piano helps accelerate those processes. This makes sense to me. So much of what children struggle with during learning is a lack of fluency brought on by their own self-consciousness. Anxiety inhibits the neural connections that make learning easier. Isn’t it harder for all of us to learn something if we are worried about doing it well enough? The presence of an animal reduces that self-consciousness and supports the capabilities of a more relaxed mind.

In her thought-provoking book, Why the Wild Things Are, psychologist Gail Nelson writes eloquently about animals in the lives of children. She cites studies demonstrating that when animals are present in the classrooms of young children, it helps them gain control of the emotional swings that are part and parcel of early childhood. Dr. Nelson also notes that by third grade, animals are much less in attendance – probably for the same logistical reasons it is hard to bring animals into traditional therapy sessions.

In my own clinical office, I have fish which, while not being as physically accessible as a cat, dog, or guinea pig, are still a source of projection for the children I work with. “Can you see Mr. Little?,” I might ask. “Does he feel shy like you do sometimes?” “How do you like my shark? He thinks he’s so tough he doesn’t have to listen to anybody –does he remind you of anyone?”

In so many ways, animals connect children to a reality larger than themselves. A child who cannot bear to share with his brother or make a concession to please his sister may faithfully walk the dog or forgive a chewed-up baseball glove—learning to nurture and empathize in the process. The companionship and devotion typically provided by the family pet can be of great consolation in a hectic household, at times when a child is “in the doghouse,” dealing with a tough transition, or feeling sad or lonely.

Pets of all kinds can truly be a "family's best friend."

5 Tips To Maximize Your Child’s Wardrobe During Seasonal Change

While the northern hemisphere prepares to put away their winter wear in preparation for the warmer summer months, we here in the southern hemisphere are doing the exact opposite.

Living here in southern Queensland, Australia, we experience relatively stable seasons. Therefore it’s not uncommon that particular clothes worn for one season are not needed again until the following year.

As adults, the uncomplicated approach to a new season can simply involve resurrecting the previous year’s items, and rearranging these items to the front of your wardrobe. Any changes to particular items are generally dictated more by fashion or personal preference than by ‘fit’ (unless of course we have gained or lost a few kilos!).

Now when it comes to growing children, the change of season often dictates a totally different approach. Depending on the individual child and their age, they’ll grow at different rates from one year to the next. The impact of this growth on an existing wardrobe, can range anything from the requirement for a ‘part’ modification (where most items still ‘fit’), up to, and including the situation where a ‘complete overhaul’ is in order (where virtually everything has been outgrown).

Particularly where the latter situation is the case, one of the first reactions to this sudden realization can be panic and stress (especially if you’re the parent who’s responsible for finding, and financing these ‘modifications’).

So ‘BEFORE’ pulling out your credit card, and rushing out on a panic shopping spree with your child / children, here are 5 practical tips to consider to save both your purse and your sanity:

1. INVEST THE TIME to go through each child’s existing wardrobe. If the idea of this task is stressful for either party, consider breaking it down into smaller manageable parts. (I.e. concentrate on one child’s wardrobe at a time, and/or break the exercise up over several sessions or days. E.g. Spend 15-30 minutes per session going through a particular section. Perhaps jumpers 1 session, and long pants the next etc.)

2. AVOID GUESSING whether an item fits or not. This includes ‘calculated guesswork’ which is the exercise of ‘holding an item’ up against the body. If it’s been several months since a child has worn an article of clothing, take the time to physically get them to TRY EACH ITEM ON. You’ll be amazed at how much more accurate your assessment will be by basing your judgments on practical testing and not calculated guesswork.

3. If you have children of the same sex, consider WORKING THROUGH THEIR WARDROBES FROM OLDEST TO YOUNGEST. Working in this manner means that ‘pre-loved’ or outgrown items from an older sibling can be passed down to the younger siblings and included in the items they will try on, along with their existing wardrobe. The benefits of this exercise are two-fold: 1. Younger siblings can find themselves with an ‘instant brand new’ (to them) wardrobe. 2. Minimizing the requirements for any one child’s wardrobe can result in a significant saving in time and money.

4. KEEP ONLY THOSE ITEMS you (and particularly your child), feel confident your child will wear. Depending on the age, personality and maturity of your child, if your child appears uncomfortable wearing a particular item, ask ‘them’ to consider if they feel they will wear it or not. If the answer is a resounding ‘no’, or their body language relays the same message, seriously consider removing that item from their wardrobe. No matter how much attachment another person may have to an article of clothing, if the person to whom it belongs is not going to wear it, the truthful fact is, it’s likely to end up taking space and energy in a cupboard. Learning to respect your child’s preferences and choices is an exercise that long term will not only save you heartache, but save your well-earned money as well.

5. SELL OR DONATE items of clothing that can’t be used by immediate family members or relatives. Occasionally there may be an article that has particular sentimental value that you may wish to retain as a ‘keepsake’. However for the most part, clothing serves its purpose when it is being worn and used. If an article is no longer being used within its current location, why not allow another individual to experience this pleasure. Not only is it a wonderful feeling to be able to give something to someone else, -- it can be also be an extremely liberating feeling to not only clear your physical space, but also clear the emotional energy attached to holding onto something that is not fulfilling its purpose.

Although the above tips require an investment of your time and energy at the outset, you’ll be well rewarded for your efforts in both the short and long term. Armed with accurate information about your child’s existing wardrobe well before you part with a single cent, will help to ensure that when you ‘do’ shop, you’re investing your time and money into the most appropriate and needed items for that particular child.

And as an added bonus, remember our children are children for such a short time. So why not take advantage of this opportunity when going through their wardrobes –- celebrate the fit of your child’s clothes as a measure of their growth from the previous year!

The Dreams for Kids Team will Race Across America-but not on Sunday

The Race Across America (RAAM) is a 3053-mile race across the country beginning in Oceanside, CA and ending in Atlantic City, NJ. RAAM is known as the world’s toughest event. Through deserts and over mountains, in conditions that will range from cold, heat, snow, rain, darkness and blazing sun, the finishers of this non-stop race across the United States will have climbed nearly 110,000 feet, equal to traveling a distance from the ground to the edge of space, four times the altitude of Mt. Everest. Those few riders to reach the finish line will have traveled a combined distance equal to circling the earth at the equator four times. There are solo riders, two-person teams, four-person teams and eight-person teams. The four-person team race begins at 2 PM Pacific Time on Tuesday, June 13 and ends at 12 PM Eastern Time on Friday, June 23. In other words, the four-person teams have 9 days and 19 hours, or 235 hours to finish the race. Dreams for Kids, a 501© (3), non-profit children’s charity, which is volunteer based and raises it donations through community fundraising and special events such as RAAM, works primarily to improve the lives of kids with disabilities. I am racing for Dreams for Kids. The Dreams for Kids cycling team, however, only has 8 days and 19 hours, or 211 hours of riding time to finish the race. This is because the Dreams for Kids team will not be riding on Sunday. As a member of the Dreams for Kids team, I am often asked, “Why aren’t you riding on Sunday?” Let me explain. I believe the Bible to be the word of God, and in the Bible it says: (1) that God created the earth and its inhabitants in six days, that He rested on the seventh day, and that He blessed and sanctified the seventh day (Genesis 2:1-3); (2) to remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy (Exodus 20:8); (3) if you keep the Sabbath day holy you will “eat your bread to the full” and that you will lie down with peace and not be afraid (Leviticus 26:2-6). I believe that we are God’s children, that He loves us, and that when we do what He asks us to do He blesses us abundantly. The word Sabbath comes from the Hebrew word shabbath, meaning day of rest. Therefore, to keep the Sabbath day holy, I believe we are to rest from our labors, rest from our selfish interests, and rest from our self-absorbing activities. The Sabbath is also the Lord’s day, and thus while it is a day for resting from our labors, it is also a day for us to do His work. It is a day to pray and worship, a day to visit the sick and distressed, a day to perform acts of kindness, a day to read and meditate. I truly believe that if I remember the Sabbath and keep it holy, I will prosper far more than if I was to labor on that day. Once again, I believe we are God’s children, that He loves us, and that if we keep His commandments He will bless us in ways that bring everlasting peace and happiness. I do not mean to be lofty or obnoxious towards those who do not believe as I do, but as noted above, I am often asked why I am not racing on Sunday, and for me, the peace I have and the blessings I believe will come from keeping the Sabbath day holy are far more valuable than winning a race.

Family Safety Tips For Fairs, Festivals, And Amusement Parks

: How do you keep your child “stranger proof” this summer? When children are out of school, there is more time for families to make life-lasting memories when going out to enjoy fairs, festivals, and amusement parks. Here’s a plan to keep them safe. Parents, you know there is always an increased stress when it comes to the safety and security of your family during an outing. Can’t stand the anxiety? Not sure where to start? Take a few minutes with a family safety plan by following some of these easy steps so it’s not just the kids having all the fun…you can too! Before going to the event, tell your child... ... to have fun while paying attention to where they are and who they are with at all times. ...they should not be alone in the park or become isolated with anyone, even characters in costume. Tell them not to accept any prizes, offers, or gifts from anyone until they have checked with you FIRST. ...they should be cautioned not to engage in conversation with or offer assistance to anyone until they have checked with you. ...to tell you if anyone approaches them or makes them feel uncomfortable. Tell you children if they are approached by anyone who tries to take them to yell “This person is not my father (mother)!” and do whatever they need to do (kick, punch, scratch,) to get away from that person. ...if you become separated in the park to go to the closest “Help/Information Center” to ask the people there to “find my parents and bring them to me here at this Center” or, in the case of older children, make the “Help/Information Center” the spot where you can “meet up”. Make sure your child understands they should never search for you on their own or look for you outside the park, especially in the parking lot. ...these rules also apply when they are taking part in a field trip through their school or youth group. If you are not joining them for the trip, they need to check first with and tell the responsible adult in charge or a designated chaperone if anything is wrong. As a parent you should... ...get all the information about the park prior to you trip, and review the park guidelines, particularly those regarding lost children. Discuss the information with your family, including what to do if you become separated. As your children what they would do in certain situations, and practice appropriate actions and responses with your children. ...get a map immediately arriving, identify the “Help/Information Centers” throughout the park and reinforce the idea these are the places for children to go to in case you become separated in the park. Making a plan before hand, in case you are separated, should greatly speed up the reunion. ...talk to your child about who can help them if they become lost, need help, or are in trouble. Examples: park personnel with nametags or uniforms or mothers with strollers and children. ...never let your child use public bathrooms or changing facilities alone. ...not put your child’s name prominently displayed on clothing, backpacks, or jewelry. ...make sure your child has emergency contact numbers with them if they ever need assistance including your cell phone numbers. ...dress your child in or asking them to wear brightly colored clothes so you can easily spot them in the park. ...accompany young children on rides in the park. Older children should stay in groups and take a friend with them wherever they go in the park. If you decide to let young children go on rides without you, wait with them in line, watch them enter the ride, and immediately meet them when they exit the ride. ...immediately report any suspicious or inappropriate behavior to authorities. ...make certain your child has change to use the telephone. If you have a cell phone or pager, make certain your children know those numbers and how to activate them on the phone. Parents might want to invest in two way radios so family members can keep in contact with each other. ...immediately report your child missing if you become separated. Be prepared to give an accurate and detailed description of your child. You should carry a recent photograph and be able to accurately describe the clothing the your child is wearing ...make certain there is going to be qualified supervision of the children by responsible adults when granting permission for your child to go on a field trip. By taking the time to share with your family a safety plan for your next trip to a fair, festival or amusement park fun can be had by all, without the worry of a family member missing or lost.